After working amongst them as an impostor for the past five years, I’ve come to realize that programmers are a bunch of horny people. I have, in learning their craft, come across quite a few… colorful terms.
I mean, here’s five dirty-sounding ones, just from Unix commands:
- finger: It’s some Unix command that lets you get information about some other user. I first heard it from my ex-coworker, who said that some guy in college fingered him. I said that I didn’t know you could do that to a guy. But apparently you can.
- fsck: It stands for “file system check.” But it looks really dirty, doesn’t it? Like FCUK. And what if it were called a “file universe,” then what were they gonna call this command? Hmm…
- mount: This mounts a disk or something. It just sounds like something that a male horse does to… well, another horse. Before mating. That’s where the horse thrusts his big penis into some kind of orifice.
- touch: Unlike the others, this is a Unix command I actually use, to create an empty file. So if I wanted to create empty files called “yourself” and “daily” in one command, you can just type “touch yourself daily” at the prompt. That’s good advice. I mean for creating multiple empty files at once.
- unzip: This extracts files from a ZIP archive. You might call that a package. So if you have your junk in a package, you should unzip it to gain access to the package. Very important to know how to do that.
Yeah, programmers have dirty minds.